Wrote this a while ago.

It is no longer enough to tell our children that they are beautiful or intelligent. We must feed them foundational values and beliefs so that when they encounter society's diet that starves them of love and acceptance (for whatever reason) they are able to have a "so-what" attitude and overcome obstacles and barriers that would limit them to a certain situation (due to their lack of specific elements that society deems the norm for acceptance or appropriation). To further this topic I would like to say that we must educate our children on what beauty and intelligence is worth. I say this specifically because throughout my entire childhood I was commended (accepted and loved) by my elders on the basis my mind, however my peers rejected me on the basis of my beauty they were the majority in my life throughout my childhood and their counter value of beauty (appearance) SEEMED to be worth more than my that mind. My elders informed me that my intelligence and talent was weighed upon where it could take me in life. As a child success was not important to me (because as a child my goals were not future oriented but more presented oriented) therefore intelligence and talent were backed by empty substance. Thus, I accepted the fallacy that beauty was more important than brains because it equated to faster acceptance than my intelligence.

All of this is why I say we must explain to our children the substance of the values we place in them. Not only does Lil' Mama need to hear her daddy say she is beautiful, but she also needs to hear daddy say that her beauty is immeasurable, invaluable, and intangible thus it is as much apart of her as her name but it is not where her identity lies. Her Father needs to tell her that her beauty is holistic encompassing both her outer appearance and her inner characteristics and personality. Furthermore, intelligence, integrity, wisdom, humbleness, confidence, and etc are all apart of her beauty and if she neglects or compromises one of those aspects then she has compromised and neglected her beauty. What is her beauty worth? It is worth her love for herself. No matter what she does she cannot forsake who she is apart from body, acquisition or loss of knowledge.